Every once in a while something so jolting happens that we are shaken to our core. Or, I should say, hopefully every so often something happens that we are shaken to our core. These shakes can seem to have variying effects on our lives – pain, heartache, the cold hard reality of facing one’s shortcomings, loss, and a slew of other failure types – but at their core these are the moments that define us. These are the moments when “sh*ft happens.”
Sometimes bad shift happens to good people and sometimes good shift happens to bad people. Shift happens to enlighten us to our own strength and abilities. Shift happens to confirm our morals and values are truly aligned with the strides we’re making in our day-to-day life. (Are we walking our talk?) Shift happens to push us and wake us up, to motivate, and ultimately change us.
In moments when true shift is happening I can find it pretty difficult to stabelize my focus. It’s hard for me to – in realtime – see clearly the causes and the effects of what’s going on around me while reaching for security, navigating my thoughts, and working to confidently understand what is happening and [more importantly] why it’s happening.
It has always been even harder for me to come to terms with the fact that we all inevitably fall, fail, and disappoint ourselves (and those around us) every once in a while. (If we’re lucky.) More often than not I feel the most alone in these moments; like I am the only one on the planet with the black eyes and bruised heart of a particular struggle. (Who doesn’t?)
The popular thought is that by avoiding the discussion on the pain and hurt within our lives, we get to control (read: stop) that pain and hurt from defining who we are to those around us. But, regardless of how hard you try to burry the thoughts, feelings and emotions, that avoidance takes over – completely.
The moral: The real growth doesn’t come from the act of failing itself. Growth comes when we find the strength to “own” and share our stories in the name of trust and learning; when we are aware of the impact it (sharing and integrating those stories) makes – not only our mental health but our physical wellbeing.
It’s these stories that unite us.
Lean into connection.